I’m not yet ready for

I’m not yet ready for a man. While I’m still happily entrenched in celibacy, many things about my life have been changing. I’ve matured a great deal since I decided to give up the joys and horrors of romance. I know that soon, I will be ready to throw myself once more to the wolves. So I’ve been thinking about…

What frykitty wants from a MAN

I’ll start with the physical, because after all, isn’t that where it always starts?

  1. He must have a body. Disembodied heads are good for a couple of jokes, but after that they’re just creepy. All my guys so far have been skinny, so now I think I’d like to try a little cush or a little beef.
  2. Short or tall, love ’em all. I love the lanky look of tall men. I love the huggability of short men. I think I’d prefer the compact at this juncture, but I’m not ruling out any particular verticality.
  3. I have a weakness for angles. Hatchet face? I’m your woman. I love a sharply cut jaw and almond-shaped eyes. Round doesn’t do it for me.

Okay, here’s the important stuff:

  1. Humor. Be funny. Smart funny, not stupid-funny.
  2. Intelligence. You must know things that I don’t know. If we know all the same stuff, what on earth is the point of getting to know you?
  3. Glasses. For me, sometimes the glass is half-full and sometimes it’s half-emtpy. I’m an optimistic cynic. If you’re glass is always half-empty, or worse, dry as a bone, forget it. Gotta have me some joy, boy.
  4. Passion. Be intense about something. Love something so much you forget to call me when you’re involved in it.

And, because I know my audience, and my audience likes SEX:

  1. My fantasy is to get naughty books and go through trying everything, as long as it only involves me and my partner. Of course, meat and potatoes is great too. Warning: I scream. Game?

Finally, here’s the big one:

  1. I AM NOT YOUR FUCKING BACKBONE. I have a lot of backbone–I can be so strong that I’m overwhelming. This attracts men who think I have enough decisiveness for both of us. Sod off. If you can’t make up your own mind, be your own motivation, know what YOU want, then I don’t want you. Yes, I can believe in someone and support them to the ends of the earth with my love and faith, but I’m not a goddamned sawhorse. If you need me that badly, I will run like hell.

That’s the list. When I’m actually ready, there will no doubt be flirty pictures plastered all over my site (you’ll notice how many there are now), ads in every online match-making site, and a lot more innuendo in the blog. Watch for it.

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